winter 1999, no 9

Buying sex toys for other people is tough. In fact, sex toys are arguably the hardest thing to buy for someone else (with the possible exception of flatware; have you ever tried to pick flatware out for someone?). Anyway, we thought, what with the holiday season fast approaching, and with all of us here being innundated with requests to pick out vibrators for girlfriends and dildos for boyfriends, it was time to create a guide to holiday shopping (in three easy steps).

Step 1: Make a list. On your list have not only the people you need to buy for, but budgets for each. There's nothing worse than leaving a sex store having spent twice what you thought you would just because you were confused by the thirty different kinds of butt plugs available.

Step 2: For each person you are buying sex toys for, ask yourself these questions: Have they ever used a sex toy? If so, did they talk about it? What kind of toy was it? Are you going to be using this sex toy with this person? If so, consider your own feelings about the toy you're considering. If they've had toys before, are you looking to get them something along the same lines, or are you looking down an entirely different street? You can use tricks to getting clues to what someone wants - in the same way that you'd find out what colour sweater they'd prefer or what CD they're hankering for. Have any favourite sex acts, special sensations or toy curiosities been revealed? If it's a first time toy, we suggest erring on the side of caution: smaller if it's for penetration; a softer buzz if it's a vibrator. A small, light flogger might be a letdown to some, but more will just leave an expensive, heftier one around unused to collect dust.

news

This past summer we welcomed two new workers at Come As You Are. Carol Camper has a longtime involvement in community activities, in particular, working as a sexual health counsellor at Hassle Free Clinic for eight years. Lucy Costa has worked as attendant for people with disabilities, and is currently also a student at York University. Drop in and say, "hi"!

Want to find out about sex toys as part of a night (or afternoon) of entertainment with your friends (or, god forbid, your co-workers)? Do you want to make your selection in the comfort of your (or a friend's) home? Well, home parties are an ideal way to join fun and cameraderie with the always enjoyable activity of selecting your first (or next) vibrator or other sex toy. Pilar Ramirez is now working in association with Come As You Are and would be delighted to host your next sex toy party. All the great products and service, at your doorstep. Just give us a call, 416-504-7934.

Not that we don't do this for the smile on your face, but it was also gratifying to be voted best sex shop in Toronto's NOW Magazine's recent reader poll. Thanks to all who voted, and to all of you who make selling sex toys an ongoing pleasure.

toys

For the person who has everything, these toys will provide a special surprise. Classic toys are making a comeback with new features. Explore new sensations with our selection listed below.

Waterproof Pocket Rocket

Our bestselling battery-powered vibrator has gone waterproof! The Waterproof Pocket Rocket has the same great Japanese quality, compact size, powerful buzz, except that it's blue and fully immersible in water. A perfect stocking stuffer for the weary traveller or the girl on the go.

The Silver Bullet

We're bringing in a classic toy for the holidays. With high power and a low price, the Silver Bullet vibe is incredibly versatile and has been wowing them for generations. This toy is specially priced until January 1.

Critter vibes

Critter vibes are the basic silver bullet vibe surrounded by jelly rubber to create the form of a frog or rabbit. The "body" provides a strong buzz, while the flicker of the frog's tongue or rabbit's ears give a unique stimulation of their own. Cute and versatile.

Dali vibe

Looking for something for all those penetration lovers on your gift list? Look no further than the Dali vibe. Surreal softness plus a strong buzz has made this toy an instant bestseller in the store. Another toy that we're bringing back is a sumptuous sensation toy from the Toy Bag.

The Excytor

The Excytor is a wood-handled paddle covered in leather on one side and soft rabbit fur on the other - for those on your list who've been naughty or nice. Paddles made by Crimson are another specialty item. They're made locally using a variety of woods of worldwide origins and their natural oil finish reveals the unique beauty of each one. We've added a new lube to our shelves.

Foreplay Lube De-luxe

Foreplay Lube De-luxe is a water-based gel that lasts longer than any lube we've tried. Thicker, and a little greasier than other brands, it's great for anyone looking for a thicker, long lasting lubricant.

videos

Videos hold a special place in our hearts as a vehicle of expression that often includes a tense moment of debate, a guilty pleasure, a fight for enjoyment. As more of us participate, becoming selective viewers, the more porn will come to reflect our tastes.

That's why when it comes to bringing the conversation of porn out of the closet - what better way than giving a video as a gift The newest actress ringing our bells is Chloe. She's got an attitude that makes us swoon. Two new videos feature her talents. Chloe's: What Makes You Cum is narrated by the star herself and features Chloe and her friends on a raucous sex binge. Porn veritè at its best.

Bend Over Boyfriend 2 is a girl-penetrates-boy follow-up to the immensely successful original video - with "more rockin' and less talkin'" this time around. We almost couldn't recognize Chloe here without her porn star makeup and garb; but, her raw energy, insatiability and aggression are unmistakable, if a little toned down.

We once again present the ever-popular three-packs. In a time of cold weather and warm fireplaces, the packs offer a little bit of cheer for everybody - from the porn newbie to the aficionado. Videos that offer heat, excitement and are 100% coal free. Expand your horizons with the Holiday Mixer pack. It's like the beer ads, but with porn instead. We've selected one each of our best-selling straight, gay, and lesbian titles and voila - something for everybody.

Our most popular director is now available in a pack of three. Solid directing that people have come to rely on. Lush sets combined with fabulous style make Andrew Blake a favourite. Say it with us: Superstar! Stellar performances from the cream of the porn world. A three-pack featuring Nina Hartley, Asia Carrera, Sunset Thomas, and rising star Jenna Jameson. A showcase that will knock the wool socks off.

books

Gift-giving can be a time of extravagance, or a time of anxiety when the totals on your gift lists exceed your budget. With this in mind, we're offering up suggestions on books for a splurge or a few pennies (well, under $15), as well as new titles that will burn up the bookshelves this season. Erotic art books top our list of delightful, precious items.

Choose from the lush, dreamy contemporary erotic photographs in Eros; tantalizing fetish photography in Forms of Desire by Doris Kloster; startling veritè in Voyeur; passionate lovers in Michael Rosen's Lust & Romance; or a compilation of several photographers in Libido's Best. The Erotic Lives of Women combines evocative photos with text for a fascinating glimpse into the sexual realities of women around the world.

You don't need to spend a lot to put a smile on someone's face. Illustrated Perfumed Garden, Sensual Aromatherapy and The Soul of Sex are for sale at a fraction of the original price. Cinèmatique is a spicy radio drama-style audiotape featuring lesbian scenarios; while Hypnotherapy is a guided visualization sexual experience. Or try Juxtapoz's Erotica, an erotic art magazine in its new, fifth volume.

New titles for December include Hot & Bothered 2 and Best Lesbian Erotica 2000 for fans of high quality lesbian smut and Quickies 2 and Best Gay Erotica 2000 for fans of the gay variety. The recently-published Full Exposure offering Susie Bright's trademark wisdom and sass is a sure winner.

workshops

EROTIC WRITING

A four-week course with Kathryn Payne that will focus on developing your erotic voice and the unique skills to express it, through writing exercises and discussion of participants' work. Cost is $45. Jan 31, Feb 7, 14 & 21 7:30-10:30 pm

THE ETHICAL LOVER

Drawing from the bestselling book, The Ethical Slut, and principles of negotiation and consent in responsible BDSM relationships, this three-week workshop is a chance to explore with others ways to create rewarding sexual relationships. For women only. Facilitated by Leanne Cusitar. Cost is $20. March 15, 22 & 29 7:30 - 10:00 pm

SEX, SPIRIT & AROMATHERAPY

A discussion on sexuality and aromatherapy. Find out about aphrodisiacs, and how to create erotic massage oils and sensual atmospheres with essential oils. With Nadine Artemis of Osmosis, Everyday Aromatherapy. Cost is $20. March 28 7:30 - 10:00 pm

KAMA SUTRA

Combining lecture, discussion and practical components, this four-week course will explore Kama Sutra through four areas: its historical context; food & aphrodisiacs; sex (including homosexuality); and physical environment. With Sudharshan Duraiyappah. Cost is $55. April 18, 25, May 2 & 9 7:30 - 10:00 pm

FEMALE EJACULATION

Returning with her popular seminar, Shannon Bell will discuss female ejaculation from a historical and theoretical perspective, followed by an overview of anatomy and technique, plus a demonstration. For women, and men accompanied by a woman. Cost is $15. June 6 7:30 - 10:00 pm