valentine's 1999, no 7

Sex has a way of spilling out over other aspects of our lives; so too, it draws everything into its realm. Since we are coming up onto the season of romance - the main time of year for displaying, effusively, your love, devotion and passion to your significant other - we thought we'd take a look, as purveyors of things sexual, at the place of love and romance in our sex lives. We never wanted to have a store that put sex under lock and key, or swept it into a closet with sticky floors.

Sex is very much a part of our whole lives, whether it's the erotically-charged flirtations with near-acquaintances, appreciative glances in the street, tricking during lunch hour or anticipating a hot scene with your lover tonight. Erotic undercurrents may flow beneath platonic or professional relationships or erupt during the most inopportune or seemingly unerotic times. Sexual energy, sublimated or not, can fuel almost anything we can call a passion - dancing, reading, talking with friends, painting, running down the street, relaxing in the bath.

To sexual pleasure, we may bring longings, joy, anxieties, vanity, frustrations, anger, mischeviousness. And the disowned emotions may be more erotically-charged and be transmuted to bring us more pleasure. We may use sex to get many things besides physical or emotional pleasure - power, status, a reputation (a bad one has its own value), thrills, new experiences, money, bargaining chips, self-worth, love.

I suspect that people don't go to the Bay, the Body Shop or the liquor store and ask the salespeople where they can find someone to help them enjoy the products these establishments sell. And it would be easy enough to say that sex - be it with toys, erotica, or your own hand - is something you can enjoy all by yourself. For many, at least some of the time, this is true. But for lots of us, sex as an interactive event gives it that special dimension. Plus the fringe benefits that come with it: intimacy, communication, and not least - to paraphrase Lyle Lovett's character in the movie The Opposite of Sex - to be valued as special in your lover's eyes.

Now, this may sound uncharacteristic coming from those whose business is providing the tools, descriptions and depictions to supplement, kick-start or stoke your sex life. But, as I said before, it's not so clear-cut. We don't have a lot in the store about love or finding a partner (though we do have some books that are downright romantic), but we do recognize that a love relationship may be a precondition for good sex with a particular individual, or that good sex with someone may cause you to consider giving them a whole lot of (non-sexual) love. At the very least we hope that sex is (at least some of the time) about love: loving yourself, your body, your passions and desires - as well as those others whom you choose to share these with.

St. Valentine was a Christian bishop who went against a Roman decree against marriage to marry lovers. For this, he was beheaded in 269 AD, it is believed on the 14th of February. The holiday in his honour is based, also, on the lovers' festival of Lupercalia, which celebrated Juno, an ancient Roman goddess. This layering effect gives St. Valentine's Day a long and rich history. It also gives us an opportunity to choose a meaningful way to recognize its significance - and not necessarily accept what has been given to us by Hallmark, grade-school card exchanges and expensive dinners on King Street. We wish you lots of love (and sex) - wherever and with whomever you may find it.

toys

As announced in our last news-letter, we have indeed expanded our power play section. Our new restraints, floggers, slappers, cats, single-tails, collars, paddles and crops are created out of extraordinarily sensual materials. And they can be used to create sensations as light as a tickle or tap, or as intense as a stinging thwack. Wooden paddles come plain, leather-padded or fur-lined and are made from luxurious woods such as Cocobola, Bocotè and Blood-wood.

In addition to our regular and padded leather and vinyl fun-fur ones, restraints are now available in rubber and the super deluxe model - fleece-lined restraints in rich brown leather. A new bondange kit from Leatherbeaten in Peterborough comes complete with a pair each of wrist and ankle restraints, plus four tie-down straps. Just the thing to ensure undying devotion.

A range of floggers will suit almost any budget: From a light, elegant number with a wooden handle and a brown leather fall (30. 00) or an intense biter (40. 00) to a luxurious flogger with a heavy fall (160. 00). One unique model is the Scratch, Tickle & Whip, a flogger that also has a lush feather tassle made of downy and overcoat feathers as well as a section of velcro for an acutely scratching sensation.

From Victoria, British Columbia comes a slapper made of recycled rubber by Spare. This "environmentally kinky rubberware" will suit any climate. For those looking for a lighter touch, we still have an array of feathers in colours sure to tickle your fancy. In all, we are now carrying sensation toys from eight different companies, most one-person operations.

All these toys are made with special care by folks who actually use them, ensuring durable, effective and attractive products.come by to see and feel for yourself!

Finally, we just couldn't leave out our new Chocolate Love Cream. This already creamy Belgian chocolate melts in your microwave or double-boiler (and hopefully, a few other places) for gooey, tasty fun. In raspberry, mocha, dark and milk chocolate flavours.

videos

Celebrate the romance of sexual intrigue. Instead of wishing you had the clichèd elements of candlelight and moonlit walks, try the flicker of the TV when you slip in that tape of x-rated delight. Here's some new tapes that we have added to our shelves that offer a little more amour. Not your regular garden-variety romp in the back seat, but something with a little more seduction, a little more tease.

Dark Angel, a new film by Andrew Blake, features the sultry pseudo-biography of Dahlia Grey. This is the much awaited sequel to the very popular Paris Chic. This time around Lea is the one in control. She has moved to the States and fallen for Dahlia. Dark Angel has all the smoky cinemato-graphy that Blake is known for, as well as a little more plot and lots of sexual tension.

Zazel is another film that is visually stunning and ripe with desire. Flowers, gorgeous marsh settings and scenes that move luxuriously through the erotic imagination. If subtlety and sensual images are something you are missing, Zazel has it all.

Erotic By Nature is an outdoor romp of definitely a loving quality. A flick made by and for women, this escapade features two women who clearly share alot of chemistry. On a porch, in a creek, on a bed, in the forest, these women are fascinating to watch. A very realistic portrayal of desire and lust.

Lunachick, a film by Paul Thomas is a detailed story of love gone all wrong. A woman who has been cheated on and dumped finds solace in the arms of her shrink's husband. Those who throw stones? Spicy sex scenes and a very funny script.

Tatiana 3 offers something more explicit for those who like to go straight to the heart of the matter. Lots of group sex scenes, beautiful settings, great costumes and enthusiastic acting make this European film a favourite.

books

Interested in stoking the fires and igniting passions to a fever pitch? Well, if a nifty new toy or declarations of eternal love won't do it, you may want to try a subtler, but some may say, no less powerful approach. The story goes that Eve tempted Adam with an apple, but there are far more extravagant preparations you can make for luring a paramour. Intercourses: an aphrodisiac cookbook takes advantage of the arousing properties of chocolate, artichoke, oysters, and more to present 85 recipes - for on as well as in the body. The book's beautiful design and photography will inspire you as well.

In Aphrodite: a memoir of the senses, author Isabel Allende stirs a pot-pourri of myth, legends and storytelling with some enticing recipes. A further foray into a spun tale (leaving the recipes for the appendix), Bittersweet Journey is another gorgeous volume inspired by the inimitable allure of chocolate. This "modestly erotic novel of love, longing, and chocolate" follows a woman's obsession from Brooklyn to the great cities of lust and chocolate: Brussels, Paris, Vienna. Further investigating the nature of a woman's insatiable appetite is Fermentation. This erotic novel (by Angelica J. ) tells the story of a young pregnant woman living in a French hill town during a searing heat wave and her insatiable appetite - for cheese.

workshops

NATURAL APHRODISIACS

From the practical to the ridiculous, learn about various natural aphrodisiacs utilized throughout history and today. Herbs, essential oils, diet and mind-body medicine will be explored, as well as a hands-on chance to learn how to safely use substances that are readily available. With Agnes Sandford Ladon, a practicing Chartered Herbalist and holistic counselor. Cost is $30 (includes all materials). February 10 7:30 - 10:00 pm

GIRL PARTS AND THE BIG "O"

Learn about the what & where of women's sexual anatomy and the what & how of orgasm - in its myriad forms. With Sandra Haar (of Come As You Are). All those with girl parts welcome. Cost is $15. March 9 7:30 - 10:00 pm

FEMALE EJACULATION

Returning with her popular seminar, Shannon Bell will discuss female ejaculation from a historical and theoretical perspective, followed by an overview of anatomy and technique, plus a demonstration. All women welcome. Cost is $15. April 21 7:30 - 10:00 pm

NOT JUST BOOGIE NIGHTS

Blue Movies for the Visually Adventurous. An overview of all the porn industry has to offer. We will discuss genres, techniques, star power, and thrills. Have you ever been overwhelmed by the selection at the video store? You like the idea of watching porn but aren't too sure where to begin? This is a forum to discuss and enjoy the best of the x-rated. Cost is $15. May 19 7:30 - 10:00 pm